Finding God

Routines will be the death of me. Each day blurs into the next, causing the week to zip by. It feels like only a couple of weeks ago that I began my senior year of college, but that was six months ago, and I’m preparing to graduate in a little over two months. Time is not my most abundant asset as a full-time business student with two jobs and three volunteer positions, also attending two small groups per week. But despite the breakneck pace of my week, I still find some comfort in filling nearly every spare moment of time with something ‘productive’. At least, that was until Friday night. On Friday night I began to realize that my body was not functioning like it should have been. I became extraordinarily weak and achy, and I hardly slept a wink. So began more than four and a half days of fighting influenza, and I’m still not finished. Not my favorite cup of tea. So far I’ve missed two days of school, my volunteer shift at The Carriage House, and nine hours of work. As ...

Lately I have come to understand the relationship between myself and my Father in more detail through the simple analogy of love. Though the love we understand may be complex in many ways, as some of you may have experienced in previous relationships, the Love of the Father is so beautifully simple and even more incredible. We, as humans, often consider the love we know on this earth to be wrought with nearly as much pain as joy. This is due to our imperfect and sinful disposition, which can never seem to be fully satisfied short of a supernatural interference. I think that this is one important detail that may explain why it is so difficult for us to understand the full beauty of the Love of Christ. Because we so often feel the need to prove ourselves to other humans, we feel the same urge to attempt to prove ourselves to the One who sculpted every edge of the universe and knit our flesh together. We believe that we can make ourselves look better or have a better chance at salvat...

Life lately for me has been quite tedious and uninteresting. My days are dull and uneventful, and I’ve noticed that moments of true happiness are rare and few. I feel like I have been simply pushing my way through life – through the thirteen-hour workdays and hardly restful nights; through the long, lonely, and boring days at my apartment, and through the notions of apathy that seem to so frequently invade my thoughts. I’ve tried, rather unsuccessfully, to combat the problems currently facing me, but I’ve come to realize that I am in a spiritual rut. I’ve fallen again into the strange comfort of convenient Christianity. I simply go through the motions and choose to believe in a God who is only there for me to get what I want. I never choose to sacrifice anything lest I be robbed of the few comforts I have and choose to hold onto. I find it odd, that though I know that being a follower of Christ is about more than a simple transaction between man and a Deity, I still so of...